Guest Post: Brian "Awesome" Burch

Alrightee, my first guest post since my father wrote something relating to his penis.

First on the mic is my main man and former colleague Brian Burch. All I can say is I thought I watched a lot of TV but wow -- Burch definitely wins first prize, by a longshot. Must not be much to do out there in old Western Michigan.

Anyway, without further ado, I bring you Mr. Brian Burch posting his review of this season's newest shows.

(Ps. I agree with most of his post, the exception being Dirty Sexy Money. I think "tepid" is the correct word for the moment, but I also think it has a lot of upside potential. The Wife and I are rooting for it to prove itself, but it is running out of time and has only a week or two left to prove itself)


Let me preface my comments with "I watch a lot of TV." I don't do it because I'm lazy, I do it because I'm cheap. Per capita, this is free entertainment. I don't have to buy a ticket or wear pants to see this, I can wake up TiVo up and laugh my crack off.

That said I've watched alot of shows so far. Now that we're almost mid-way through the first installment of the new TV season, following are my thoughts on the good and badness of TV. First the goodness.

Dancing with the Stars
Wife Wifely and I love this show. Well, we both love the dancing and she really gets into the back stories of the people. I could give a crap about that. I want to see dancing and hear judges critique. We're almost mid-way through, and I have to admit, this show almost went the way of Survivor (another show we were dedicated to, but got bored with), but since Wayne Newton got the boot the show has really taken off. It's bittersweet, because DwtS conflicts with two of my all time favorite-est shows everest--How I Met Your Mother and Heroes.

How I Met Your MotherIf you're not watching this show, you are not awesome, you are sucky. Imagine a show where every character talks exactly like you and your friends. And I mean EXACTLY. The Chicago boys and I have had the same conversations about high-fives, slap-bets and picking up women. It's either uncanny or an example of how shallow we really are. They also overuse the word awesome (I have also been told I overuse that word, several times by the host of this blog, but that is ridiculous, since it's the most awesomest word in the English language). Watch it. The show is legen-DARY!

Heroes
It's so satisfying to have a show pay off so well. Heroes gave us a really dramatic and slow start in Season 1, and Season 2 isn't any different. But the characters are so great and interesting that I can't stop watching. So many questions, so many mysteries, so many twists, keep watching this show.

House
Wifely and I watch almost every doctor show that exists, (except Private Practice, but more on that later) and House is the one that makes them all worthwhile. Yes, it's formulaic and I know they're certain to discover that the problem was either incredibly simple or a rare form of cancer with only three known cases in the entire history of the world. But I watch becuase it's interesting and Hugh Laurie makes me laugh. And there's something about Cutty that gives me a funny feeling--I assure you it's a good feeling.

30 Rock
So incredibly funny. I cry laughing during every episode. I can't explain it, but I do. The writing is just so good. Why isn't SNL as funny as this?

The Office
I'm not sure the writing has gone downhill, but I still think this show is a riot. Bloody nipples?! OMG I'm laughing while I write this post.

Tepidness

Grey's Anatomy
Let's start by saying I really love hating this show. But hate seems like such a weak term to describe my feeling for the characters... I MEGA-LOATHE everyone on this show. They are shallow and vapid and every situation they're in is make-believe. It is impossible for so few people to have so many problems and issues and quirks. I hate that. But like Wife Wifely I am sucked in and watch with earnest every week.

ER
I think Wife Wifely is the only person still watching ER. Somehow she really enjoys the people and the drama still. I think it's a big, fat snoozefest. So it's on our TiVo, sadly I never watch it, but I do know exactly what's going on thanks to Wifely's weekly updates.

Back to YouI watched two episodes and wasn't really into this show. Frasier and Raymond's wife are really great and Fred Willard is off-the-wall, but it's too traditional for me to get into. I got bored.

'til Death
Raymond's brother stars in this show and so does the chest region of some woman actor. I watched a couple eps of this show last year and don't remember there being nearly as much emphasis on the boobs--I guess I should've watched more. What sucks most is the young couple is incredibly lame. It's an OK show, but nothing to get excited about.


Baddness

DirtySexyMoney
I want to love this show, because the last show about crazy, dysfunctional rich people (Arrested Development) was a work of genius. But this is not AD and sadly never will be. They're situations aren't crazy enough and I'm not sympathetic to what's happening. I think Peter Krause and Jack Bauer's dad are awesome, and the priest character is very interesting, but not enough to save the show.

Private Practice
This spinoff of Grey's Anatomy is certain to fail. Why? Wife Wifely said it best, "everybody on this show is old" and nobody wants to watch, or even think about, old people having sex. Not even me.

Big Shots
You would think a show about womanizing and incredibly good-looking dudes would be ratings gold. But these dudes don't even act like dudes, they act like girls. It also has the suckiest writing that has ever sucked. Side question, why do two ABC shows have storylines about tranny call girls? DirtySexyMoney has the same thing. Where's the originality people???
Don't waste your frickin' time.

CavemenHow do you take a spot-on brilliant commercial and turn it into a waste of frickin' time. Oh, Cavemen. This show is absolutely useless. Don't watch.

Carpoolers
There is this idiot kid who is the son of one of the carpool dudes. He's funny. Everyone else, NOT FUNNY. Don't watch.

Shows I miss because there's just too much going on
CSI
CSI:Miami
CSI: NY (I really like CSI)

Shows I'm looking forward to returning immedjietly:
Scrubs
Lost