Stratego

A bit of background.

Back in my college days, I was not the greatest student, to say the least. While there is no need to rehash the past (though I am sure my father won't hesitate to jump in on this topic), almost 20 years after the fact, I feel comfortable coming clean. I admittedly spent about half my time engaging in quasi-illicit activities that I don't need to spell out in detail for these family-friendly pages. The other half of my time was spent engaged in another, more legal "pasttime" - playing games. More specifically, Stratego.

For the record, from 1984-1988 I was the undisputed University of Michigan Stratego champion. I played hundreds -- nary, thousands, of games -- and cannot recollect losing a single time. I am sure my man Scooter will weigh in on this shortly with a sharply worded rebuttal.

Since graduating, I've played a heck of a lot less Stratego, but I have been biding my time until I could buy Stratego for the Boy, and teach him how to play a real man's game. This year he turned eight, and he is a pretty precocious kid, so I felt the time was right.

So I delivered Stratego unto him on the second night of Hanukah and to say the least, I was stoked. I spent an hour in advance explaining the rules of the game, which he seemed to grasp. Clearly, Stratego was dialed into his DNA. He asked a few questions, I answered, I taught him about the notion of strategy and finally, we were ready to go.

Game on.

I delicately unwrapped the board, all the while explaining to him how much this game meant to me, and we quickly went about our business of setting up our respective boards when .... WTF???!!! I could not believe my eyes -- they changed the value of the pieces!!!!

My beloved "1" was now a "10". Gone were the low value, but ever resourceful miners ("8"), now reduced to mere "3's. The only piece that retained the same value were the damn flag and spy.

Unfreakingbelieveable. And disconcerting, to put it mildly.

Explain to me, please -- someone -- how you can take one of the few perfect games in the freaking world, and alter it for no good reason. I can accept the notion of "change" in life as correlates to nearly anything -- except Stratego. It just makes no sense.

Before I hit "submit" on the email I am writing to the CEO of Hasbro, I would appreciate it if any of you can offer a decent explanation for this travesty.

In the meantime, I am trying to get my head around all these new values. But sadly, it just ain't the same game.

This all being said, I hasten to add that 20 years after the fact, my undefeated streak remain intact, though The Boy seems to share my love for this wonderful game and I am proud to say he is coming along like gangbusters. Just last night he whupped his five year old sister (who put her flag in the second row, which I actually thought was a fairly clever move).

Maybe in another 20 years he'll manage to actually break my winning streak.

Maybe.